well, hello.

i'm trying my best to write a new blog post and i simply can't. there's so much to say, so much to convey, and so much to catch up on i don't even know where to begin. and so i'll begin where my heart is...with a gratitude of grace list; the mere fact that God's grace has overwhelmed my life to the point of being speechless, i feel inadequate to communicate His goodness in the same way that it's impacted my life. these are some ways i've learned more about the God i serve and the way He has His hand on my life...my life; and that's something for me to talk about.

-our family dynamic has changed since last semester. the hubby got hired at our church as the small groups coordinator, making him more available to us at home and equipping him for our future ministry. God's provision is always more than we could ever think we needed.

-homeschooling has challenged me in ways i didn't expect and has yielded opportunity to trust the Lord in areas that normally cause a bit of panic. as i do the best with what i'm given, God has poured His peace over future decisions that need to be made.

-i have had the honor to volunteer with the women's ministry on campus, coordinating the small groups for seminary wives. it feeds my organizational bug by keeping me busy with emails, planning meetings, and helping keep a very effective and necessary ministry running. i am still amazed at how the Lord plopped me into this position and how i see Him drive the ministry for His glory. it is an indescribable feeling to watch first hand how He equips and teaches.

-every morning i wake up i am reminded of God's strength. sometimes Jesus chooses to heal physical pain. sometimes He calms the storm within. but for me? He has chosen to give me a spirit of dependance and faith in knowing that He is enough for me. my spiritual healing is far greater than any physical healing i need and provides my peace within. most everyday is a battle to remind myself of what i just said, but at the end of the day i always land on the same side in knowing Who my victor is - where my alliance lies. i want to be concerned with the building of my character and the perseverance of my race. i want to get to know the me that He created and understand the purpose He's created in me. i want to deeply know Him and accept His profound love for me. even when i feel defeated before the sun rises, God has a way of waking me up to victory and glory everyday.

more to come on our trip, our holidays, and our family life together...

educating joy.

we've been busy. busy organizing curriculum. busy planning informational meetings. busy coordinating women events. busy scheduling get-togethers. busy throwing parties. busy going to doctor appointments. busy finishing summer semesters. busy being rained upon by the goodness of God.
i'm excited to host my first homeschool meeting tomorrow evening with the other ladies of the building who are choosing this journey with their kiddos this fall. i'm so excited to find out what curriculum others are using, what works best for them, and what doesn't. i'm really looking forward to my friend who is going to speak on the techniques and tools to help educate our children, no matter where we are in the process. she is an awesome educator and used to be a homeschool tutor for families. i'm so thankful for her willingness to possibly do this once a month or twice per semester. this is the kind of stuff that just makes me oh-so-happy!
i thought i'd post the same information that i'll be passing out tomorrow. i spent some time finding some of my favorite websites for curriculum choices, free games/activities, many free printables {coloring pages, math puzzles, reading/writing practice}, book choices, and a great reading list complied by reading level.
there are so, so many more, but there are a few in this list that i keep going back to because of their ease of use or simply because i know jess loves them! have fun browsing...whether you homeschool or not, they are great resources to keep your little minds busy growing!

general curriculum:

christian book {sing, spell, read, and write}

lamp post publishing

classical homeschooling {check out their 1000 good books list by reading level}

my father’s world

sonlight

abeka

the mailbox books

calvert homeschool

k12 online education

resources/supplies:

discount school supply

ziggity zoom

parents{dot}com

holiday smart

simply charlotte mason

lakeshore learning {sign up for their teacher discounts – school sale now through Sept. 5th}

half price books {teachers/homeschool moms gets 10% discount card for all purchases}

mardel {stock up during their educational sale/coupons/bargain book deals}

free printables/games/activities:

star fall

super teacher worksheets

www{dot}dltk-kids{dot}com

www{dot}dltk-bible{dot}com

math/counting games

brain pop {30 day trial}

science/history:

nourish interactive

apologia educational ministries

reading/writing/spelling:

handwriting without tears

rod and staff books {spelling by sound and structure}

"teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons" by siegfried engelmann and phyllis haddox and elaine bruner

easy grammar

"primary language lessons" by emma serl

math:

math-u-see

singapore math

my oh my.

can it be true?

i'd like you to meet:

pure happiness.
total bliss.
impulse.
too much of a good thing.
an empty wallet.
hours browsing.
endless homeschool resources.
unadulterated joy.
the love of creativity.
the love of all things pretty.
and sparkly.
and, and, and…

together, held by the same steel beam.
together on the same slab of concrete.
together.

did they know they’d make such a beautiful team?

yes, i am a complete and utter hobby lobby geek and now, a newly found mardel's nerd. and very happy to be both.

life, everyday {week forty six}.

{04.30.10} friday: to me, this symbolizes freedom. carefree days. summer sun. splashing in the pool. catching some rays. diving for mermaids. for others, it may mean laundry.
{05.01.10} saturday: since my sweet girls hadn't been feeling 100% the last couple of days, i decided they needed some baskin robbins ice cream to soothe their sicklies. it's been a very, very long time since i've walked through their cake-covered doors, but i knew exactly what i wanted and what was waiting especially for me on the other side of those thirty-something-flavored counters. cappuccino blast, please...with a side of thank-you-very-much. yum!
{05.02.10} sunday: we had the huge, chunky honor of visiting the launch of this family's church today. what an exciting journey they've been on and it was a joy to see the capacity of what this meant to this church family. these two were beyond thrilled to see each other...in their opinion, it's been way too long since they got to give squeezes. i would have to agree.
{05.03.10} monday: what two year old wouldn't use the floor rug for a blanket?
{05.04.10} tuesday: not only did jess get to see ms. j twice in one week, but all three of these beauties are super special in my book. it's these kind of pictures captured that will make me remember the sweet moments made at seminary. friends made, giggles shared, tears made in the physical goodbyes. it's all there. it's all real.
{05.05.10} wednesday: jessa girl, as much as daddy was excited to have you enter into one of many childhood passages, it's okay that you didn't like the twinkie as much as daddy anticipated you would. it really is. i understand they're sweet, mushy, and just...well, kinda gross. i get it, babe. {note: cute delighted smile was after the first tiny nibble, but before the second real bite}
{05.06.10} thursday: there are no words.

i'm here.

it's not so fun getting back to the routine and schedule of things after family leaves. however, it is necessary. it doesn't help that miley girl keeps asking "where's papa?!" when she wakes up and hears the front door open only to discover it's daddy coming home from a morning run.

as playgroup resumes this week, i can't help but think we only have five weeks left {including tomorrow's class}. this whole year we've been taking one week to do each letter of the alphabet by implementing a bible portfolio project with the upper case letter one day and a game/craft/lesson when we do the lowercase partner on the following day. with only ten playgroup meets left, i'm going to have to teach one letter per day if we're going to make it through the alphabet. when i went to count it out, we will complete 'Z' perfectly on the last day we meet {which will also have to include a large party of sorts - of course}. i feel like i should still be in the stages of organizing a lesson plan for the year. like i should be planning our schedule. buying supplies. getting it 'together'. but here we are...almost done. *boo*

most of my precious little ones that come to preschool playgroup are moving away when we're all finished, which is the main reason we need to finish on time. we've seen several come and go throughout the year, but out of the four i have left, one has already moved an hour away; another is moving to england; one is moving to vermont...and then the other, along with jessa, will be moving into kindergarten. i'm feeling windblown by time. whoosh.

we had a lovely easter weekend together even though it was saturday morning that grammy flew back home in the "hairplane". the girls had a easter egg hunt {as in, find the obvious eggs as they sit in the grass} over on the campus lawn on saturday morning. it was our first experience with anything like that...and it lasted three minutes and 16 seconds. if that. i was shocked at how quickly 500 eggs can be scooped up by eager little hands. thankfully, the girls walked away with several in their little personalized pails, miley consuming ALL of her candy thanks to daddy's help unwrapping. he's weak when it comes to sugar...and more weak when it comes to miley girl giving him 'the look'. we all know it.

we had such a relaxing, carefree kind of easter sunday {with my focus being on what it's really about} that i didn't even snap one picture of my girls in their dresses. bummer, yes. end of the world? not so much. the only picture i took was of our dessert i made. big whoop. food? cute girls in dresses. food...? cute girls in dresses...? i think i see a set-up photo op on the horizon.

actually, i can't stop thinking about what God the Father gave and what God the Son obediently sacrificed on my behalf. why me? why everyone else? why Him? His perfection and holiness made Him the Only begotten. the Only choice. the Only option. the Only out. it was the only way God the Father would be satisfied with the abolishment - the annihilation. obliteration. extermination. elimination - of sin. of death. Jesus was it.

and we can have it.

and we can share it.

and we can demonstrate it in our lives.

that just pumps me up!

a cry for help.

i am completely and utterly overwhelmed with one of the most pivotal decisions we have to make concerning jessa's {and one day, miley's} education in the fall.

here's what i have:

jessa is so eager to learn and so super excited to someday go to school. i honestly don't know how she would respond if i told her she would stay home with mommy five days a week instead of venturing off so independently. she enjoys what we do twice a week with her little friends and eagerly calls it "school", asks a gazillion questions about what surrounds her on a daily basis, and is on the verge to taking off with her reading with the right tools and encouragement. all of this is a wee bit overwhelming to be put into my hands to help mold and move in the right direction for her learning skills. homeschooling has always been a little more at the top of the choice list, but with the endless options for curriculum and 'styles', the cost of curriculum, and what would work best for our family are all questions i wish had an 'easy' button.

private school = expensive = out of the question = oh well. there is an option a few miles away that i may look into that offers scholarships to specific seminary students. this may be an option {not getting my hopes up}.

public school {especially kindergarten} in our area is basically not much of an option as well. it makes me too uneasy and looking into other districts is questionable.

as any big decision, i've placed it in capable hands, trusting the Lord will mold His character into what choices need to be made. He led me to Proverbs 4 {amazing!} and an inspirational phone call to my mom. i was homeschooled as an ankle biter, so i knew she would have some insight into some confusion i had about the whole thing. as much as i enjoyed the experience, homeschooling has come a long, long way since the 20 years i found myself studying under my mom and dad at the kitchen table {those were some really good times}.

nothing will ever change though, and that's the fact that homeschooling is so flexible, it's genuine, and it's adaptable to how your child learns. it's a lifestyle - teaching as you live. every opportunity a lesson. it's so much more than that, too...and it makes me wonder if i'm built for discovering its full potential.

i'm taking one year at a time {more like one day, right?}. the beginning of her first grade year will pose the same questions and could very well yield different results. i'm excited to look back in a few months and see where the Lord has brought us and what He's preparing to teach all of us in this process.

our "bigger" space.

as i stand with my back against the front door, you can notice more carpet space for princess dance twirls and ballet moves {this space being known as our built in ballroom}. it has been quite lovely being blessed with more room so early into our stay here - we truly feel spoiled. this is the first time i really felt good taking a picture of the living area...and now that i did, we actually just moved the desk that is sitting below the window into our bedroom for more solitude during study time. we believe that's been a smart move and frees up even more space, creating more light to flow into the living/family room.
this is my happy space. our little playgroup happens here and with enough space to now store all of our fun activities, crafts, and games, there are endless opportunities for learning! *smile

more to come {cause you just have to check out the girl's princess room...it simply glows pink}.

a lesson for me.

today was the first official day of our preschool playdates! and i have to tell you...i had SO much fun! really, i did.

it reminded me just how cool the Lord is to create such beautiful, creative, captivating, and curious little people. preschoolers are completely awesome and adorable and here's just one reason; two of the little girls were asked separately what they had learned today in class, both answering, "i learned about cookies!" umm...ok. i don't remember teaching them about cookies, but if that's what they learned, then so be it! *smile

i figured we'd spend our first time together learning about each other, our names, our families, and do a little song and devotion. we focused on the letters of their names, had sharing time with their 'family drawings', and made beaded name necklace/bracelets for craft time. and one of the most important things we did today was all contributed to the "playdate rules" board, each giving one good example that should be included. my all-time favorite, 'no whining - be joyful'. *wink

and then something happened...

after everyone had gone home with their respective mommies, i asked jess if she had fun at her first day of school. she timidly replied with a nod and then said, "...but i'm a little bit upset." my mind triggered, thinking, perfect! a prime opportunity to jump into her little head and heart to see what's going on. i asked her to come sit on my lap so that i could listen to why she was a little bit upset.

and this is what she said...

"well, i went first after my friend, when my other friend was supposed to go next {here, she's talking about when she took cuts at the sink to wash hands. she had already apologized to her little friend, but obviously still felt bad. and then she continued...}. and you're the teacher."

i gulped. is she saying what i think? "yes, hunny, i AM your teacher! cool, huh?!"

again, she sheepishly nodded, but this time it was an obvious 'no'.

she. doesn't. like. me. as. her. teacher? my heart hurt just a little bit.

"i don't want you to be my teacher", she responded with her nod. "you're lizzy's teacher and i want lizzy's mommy to be my teacher."

ok, i kind of see where this is going - so i continue to encourage her with my best, explaining what a true blessing it is to get to stay home and teach her. for her to be taught wonderful things by her own mommy. i forced my most uplifting voice out of my mouth, full of hope and promise...every bit of it true. i squeezed a small smile from her lips when i was finished, with her saying, "can i go back and color now?" with a big hug and loves, i let her go.

i was left thinking to myself, am i truly prepared for this? did i do my best to prepare her? concerning the latter, obviously not. she taught me a lesson with her toddler concerns and even though they hurt for a minute, i understood that she is learning right along with me. i understand that she is in a unique position for mommy to be the teacher for not only her, but other wee ones. she's learning. but most importantly, i'm learning the biggest lesson of all.

ultimately, the Lord holds her precious heart in His hands. but He has obliged me to take care of her here and now. so as i teach her her abc's, i pray the lessons go so much deeper...leaving a lasting impression of good memories and happy thoughts of her and mommy. at home. learning together.