well, hello.

i'm trying my best to write a new blog post and i simply can't. there's so much to say, so much to convey, and so much to catch up on i don't even know where to begin. and so i'll begin where my heart is...with a gratitude of grace list; the mere fact that God's grace has overwhelmed my life to the point of being speechless, i feel inadequate to communicate His goodness in the same way that it's impacted my life. these are some ways i've learned more about the God i serve and the way He has His hand on my life...my life; and that's something for me to talk about.

-our family dynamic has changed since last semester. the hubby got hired at our church as the small groups coordinator, making him more available to us at home and equipping him for our future ministry. God's provision is always more than we could ever think we needed.

-homeschooling has challenged me in ways i didn't expect and has yielded opportunity to trust the Lord in areas that normally cause a bit of panic. as i do the best with what i'm given, God has poured His peace over future decisions that need to be made.

-i have had the honor to volunteer with the women's ministry on campus, coordinating the small groups for seminary wives. it feeds my organizational bug by keeping me busy with emails, planning meetings, and helping keep a very effective and necessary ministry running. i am still amazed at how the Lord plopped me into this position and how i see Him drive the ministry for His glory. it is an indescribable feeling to watch first hand how He equips and teaches.

-every morning i wake up i am reminded of God's strength. sometimes Jesus chooses to heal physical pain. sometimes He calms the storm within. but for me? He has chosen to give me a spirit of dependance and faith in knowing that He is enough for me. my spiritual healing is far greater than any physical healing i need and provides my peace within. most everyday is a battle to remind myself of what i just said, but at the end of the day i always land on the same side in knowing Who my victor is - where my alliance lies. i want to be concerned with the building of my character and the perseverance of my race. i want to get to know the me that He created and understand the purpose He's created in me. i want to deeply know Him and accept His profound love for me. even when i feel defeated before the sun rises, God has a way of waking me up to victory and glory everyday.

more to come on our trip, our holidays, and our family life together...

a thousand graces.

*i'm not even going to pretend i have an excuse. my intentions have been absent though my graces have been many. i dusted some off from a drafted post from many months ago and added quite a handful more.

78. my hubby's leadership skills.

79. unlimited text messaging. this is a very big deal and i'm not even joking.

80. an almost two-hour-just-because-phone-chat with my eldest brother.

81. God's creativity in creating animals. so unique. different. and stinkin' cute.

82. my new baked chicken recipe. so easy and oh-so-delicious.

83. our family and where we are in life. it's good.

84. my girl's beauty in every. single. way.

85. miley's adoration for puppies.

86. headbands and necklaces...especially when there's a new pile sitting outside your door.

87. quiet, peaceful naptimes.

88. trees swaying in the breeze.

89. good ol' fashioned fudgesicles.

90. jessa's hilarious contemplations during movies.

91. sisterly giggles in a shared bed.

92. freshly brushed teeth.

93. grapefruit with a light dusting of salt.

94. bagels when they're nice and soft.

95. miley's little pink painted toenails.

96. morning swims.

97. afternoon swims.

98. evening swims {i think those are my favorite}.

99. when something lost is found.

100. a friend who isn't afraid of keeping me accountable.

*click here to find out more about the gratitude community.

a thousand graces.

55. mama visits.

56. the expectancy that an airport brings.

57. joy lines on happy, beautiful faces.

58. princess twirls and ballet moves from a proud little girl.

59. my little artist telling her stories of the bible from her p.o.v.

60. friends telling stories while puppies out the window catch their attention.

61. misty rain.

62. the smell of a wood-burning stove {oh, how i miss that these days}.

63. vibrant orange. melancholy yellow. brilliant magenta. soothing green. all colors of a gorgeous fall {oh, how i'm missing that even more these days}.

64. how the fog settles on & hovers over the 'giants' of downtown.

65. sweet words from my baby's learning & growing vocab.

66. miley girl's out-of-the-blue-leg-hugs.

67. seeing someone you knew long ago.

68. reading a really. good. book.

69. changing my attitude for the better of others.

70. finishing my bible study...and letting it really soak my soul.

71. reassuring phone calls.

72. early anticipations of the christmas season. eek!

73. God moving.

74. God working.

75. God establishing His presence.

76. the hubby's consistent schedule on the job. very grateful!

77. the angelic sound of baby giggles.

a thousand graces.

{multitude monday a.k.a. whatever day works best}

36. big brown eyes.

37. movies that challenge my thinking.

38. a clean countertop.

39. familiar faces.

40. favorite framed photos.

41. provision.

42. a happy heart.

43. frustrating situations that make me stronger in the end.

44. healing.

45. a hubby that adores me.

46. a hubby that treasures his girls.

47. goose bump moments.

48. taking a walk in "perfect" weather {this is usually mid-spring or beginning of fall}.

49. [undeserved] love from the Father.

50. my passion for creativity.

51. a warm and snuggly hug.

52. staying up so late i don't even recongnize the english language.

53. accomplishment.

54. fresh, cold fruit.

prepare my heart.

it had to be coming. i should have expected it with every ounce of my being.

i should have been more prepared.

i was on a happy track of counting my blessings and numbering them one by one. i joined that community of being grateful and what do you know...

today, i have a very frustrating day!

i should have been more prepared.

i was told and believed that it would change my perspective. it would open the eyes of my heart. it would change the way i saw things.

i should have been more prepared.

it started with a quite large unexpected bill in the mail. followed by a confusing phone call. and then a sick baby girl. then a trip to the dreaded {and very scary} health benefits office, joined by two schizophrenics and one released jailbird. this was after a very intrusive and rude phone call to the operator's office {which almost left me in tears}. meanwhile, it's the first day of classes for one slightly overwhelmed hubby. this isn't how i pictured it.

i should have been more prepared.

i'm not quite sure why i expected things to suddenly fall nicely in place and for "it's a small world after all" to be the soundtrack of my new days {that might actually be more annoying than anything}. i'm not sure why i thought i'd be on some joyful cloud 24/7. we all know that's not the nature of our being. we all know it takes time. even good habits take time to sink in.

i should have been more prepared.

i should have understood from past experience that the enemy creeps when we're on a steady path. he slithers through, ready for attack. he muddles our perspectives. he waits.

i should have been more prepared.

i need to guard my heart with more caution. i need to continue running with godly perspective. i need to put up my armor against daily battles. whether big or small. i need to gaze with eyes of thankfulness. always. i need to give myself more time. i need to give the Lord more time to work and not be so hasty. i need to practice patience and be reminded that His glory is found even in the mud of life.

after practicing awareness and positivity in negative circumstances {the kind that you want to punch in the face} i'm in a more calm and soothing place {if you ignore the previous aggressive remark *wink}. a place of peace amidst a small and tiny storm.

and next time...

i will be more prepared. *this may or may not involve boxing gloves

Lord, give me grace today.

with that, i will continue running my race of gratitude and leave with my gracious gifts from yesterday...

26. husband home early.

27. coffee in hand.

28. soft blankie in tightly clenched baby arms.

29. a shared bowl of fishy crackers.

30. generous adorable hand-me-downs from new friends.

31. life-impacting messages.

32. mountaintop experiences.

33. the Lord's impeccable sovereignty.

34. yummy crispy homemade burritos.

35. back rubs.

my personal strategy.

*update for post below*

i wanted to share how i will personally go about documenting my one thousand gracious gifts. you know, in case you were wondering. *wink

my family has already started a faithfulness journal {using my wonderful and fabulous journal from ness over at the best nesst} that records ways that the Lord has been good on His word. in that case, i'll be needing about ten journals over the course of our journey here.

the reason for this faithfulness journal, like i said, is to remember the goodness of God, mostly during this seminary journey {it will be incredible to look back on}. His continued faithfulness is what triggers my soul to be thankful. i will most likely use many of the things in that journal to contribute to my 1,000 list.

also, i will try to spend [each] evening before i go to bed reviewing my day and writing down those things that are overflowing from a grateful heart. what's better than going to bed with a heart full of praise? like ann voskamp said, "praise is what we were made for."

i highly recommend you visit her site for more information to see how others are joining this inspirational and life changing community.

blessings as you humbly and wholeheartedly search for ways to bring God glory!

a thousand graces.

1,000 gifts - inspired by the gratitude community @ holy experience.

my heart's ablaze with feelings and things that overwhelm praise to my God. i figured the easiest way to document these is through a community of fellow believers that find the importance in recognizing a gracious God who deserves our praise.

it's quite simple and you can do it too. for more information on joining, please visit holy experience in my sidebar. giving thanks doesn't come with a manual, it's not complicated. but it's not always easy. take as much time as you want each week, or even each day, to privately or publicly record your grateful heart. your life will change before your eyes. it's refreshing. renewing. rejuvenating to the soul. join me.

*with no formal order, my journey begins*

1. the middle portion of a creamy peanut butter and raspberry jelly sandwich with so much jelly that it's oozing out of the bottom.

2. miley's persistent chanting of "daddy! daddy! daddy!" when she's in timeout. this is her sign that she's done whining. it really is the cutest sound.

3. my mother's infectiously joyful smile.

4. jessa's adorably quirky comments {"no way!" "holy cow!" "you've got.to.be.kidding.me?!"}.

5. the incredible & convenient technology of skype.

6. fellowship with new friends. fresh. easy. fun.

7. the purity that is produced through my baby girl's giggles. talk about infectious.

8. the challenge of being content each moment of every day.

9. being a better steward of our money. not spending. period {except for those slurpees on sunday. those were good.}.

10. holding hands.

11. flowers picked carefully by sweet loving hands and delivered with, "mama, close your eyes! now...OPEN!"

12. my hubby's squishy kisses. i love them to pieces.

13. storage baskets.

14. when my girls gather around on their floor to read a story. miley must be plopped in my lap while jessa leans on one side, both eager to hear a new adventure unfold.

15. the Lord's ability to surprise me daily.

16. the way the trees dance in a light breeze. soothing. relaxing. full of song.

17. how jess has the ability to draw people to her.

18. miley kisses. with lower lip sticking out.

19. the sound of summer lawn mower.

20. the smell of freshly cut vibrant green grass.

21. a stranger's friendly wave.

22. natural light.

23. bird's soaring escape. elegant. beautiful. free.

24. peaceful sleep.

25. around him, i can be me. from puffy swollen tear stained eyes to geeky attacks of laughter. just me.