blah.

okay. so i'm in one of "those" moods. not sure why exactly. well, maybe i do. today was a day of adventure. to see how much i could handle outside of the house. at the dr. yesterday, we found out that i do not need to be put on bed rest because i am far enough along for any serious danger. i think i had just hit that mark this week. it is basically up to me as to how much i want to put my little body through (when i say little, i do not mean in size). :) so, back to my adventure today. i had to run to the post office to mail our lovely taxes and then pick up a scrapbook for a "project" i am working on. this did not seem to be too bad. as i arrived home, little j had fallen asleep in the back seat, as it was past her nap time...oops. i carried...yeah, carried, her inside and put her in bed. two seconds later, she started crying for "pink soup" (if you do not know what this is, look to past blog 01/25/08 ). she was hungry, rightly so. i told her she must go to bed after she ate. she willingly agreed. she ate. she drank. she was happy. back to bed she goes...screaming! yeah, the blah attitude is because i witnessed the 5% side of her today. she wanted more juice. she wanted to snuggle with mommy. she wanted pink bear and penguin; ie: she wanted to stay up with whatever it took. reluctantly, i had to act upon my mommy duties and it wasn't fun. she threw her fit. i had mine (just kidding). i tried my best to ignore hers. and so this went on...for a long time. finally, i thought the sweet little angel had fallen asleep. only to hear 1/2 hour later something to the tune of whining...again. so yup, no nap. only grumpiness, but this time, on my part. for some reason, i'm not happy with the whole situation. not too sure why it's affecting me differently today. i told her she is going to bed early tonight. and guess what? she willingly agreed. wait until bedtime comes, right? :) about 30 minutes after getting out of bed, going potty on the toilet and dinkering around, she comes to me and apologizes for not taking her nap. she did this on her own (she must have sensed my unhappiness). it was sweet and needed. i'm super glad she tuned into that on her own. she asked me where my smile was previous to her acknowledgment. after apologizing, she gave me a hug and a kiss and then squealed when she saw a big smile across my face! it amazes me how much she depends on my happiness. but then again, i remember being young and 'needing' my mama's approval and praise. nothing i wanted more was having a healthy relationship. this plays into so much that we're learning in our parenting class. teaching children that their wrongdoing and disobedience puts a barrier between relationships.

anywho, just 'one of those days'. wow...my blahness kind of dispersed just by writing about it.